My 3 Secret Confidence Hacks

One thing I’m often asked is how to beat self doubt and imposter syndrome (I also have masterclasses on these topics in my membership ). Personally, I haven’t experienced imposter syndrome in many years and believe my daily spiritual practice plus self love rituals have played major roles in that.

It wasn’t always this way though! I used to have crippling self doubt, social anxiety, and imposter syndrome that was so overwhelming it led me to run off a stage to cry and shake in the washroom stall for half an hour, missing my first speaking engagement and letting down hundreds of attendees who specifically came to see me that day.

Since that unfortunate event, I promised myself I’d commit to this work so that would NEVER happen again. Yes, I still get nervous before speaking as I’ve never been a natural talker (writing is my space of comfort!) but now I have the tools to cope with those fears.

I’ve also picked up little tools to add to my toolbox that remind myself those silly arising fears are not reality. I noticed while searching confidence hacks online that the tips can be quite generic, so I wanted to share three of my favourites that actually work, and may be new to you.

They’re easy to do and yield fantastic results.

• Every time someone compliments you online, screenshot it and put it in your I’M A GODDESS folder (or whatever fun name you want to give it!) For me, I mostly do this with the feedback I receive around the work I do, as this is where self doubt can still at times arise. To start this off, text some of your closest friends and ask them what some positive qualities about you are, or ask why they’re friends with you. Say it’s for a little project you’re working on. I asked my Instagram community once on my stories why they follow me, and I was so surprised and touched by the beautiful responses I received. Even if it’s a little comment on a photo you posted, save it! When you’re feeling down hop into that folder of love and praise and it’ll instantly brighten your day. And yes, I now look browse through mine before I go on stage! Ps. If you’ve ever given me positive feedback, know that I deeply appreciate you and you’re in there! I always take time to pause and fully receive any nice thing someone says to me, whether in person or online, you should try practicing this too! Stop what you’re doing, really take it in and receive those words, even if it’s something simple.

• This one you may be familiar with but I want you to actually put this into action and this is your challenge: do it every day until it feels natural and not awkward. Let us know in the comments how many days it took if you feel called to share! I think I’ll practice this again too as I realize I haven’t in a few years… These days I always tell myself I love myself every day without needing the reminder, just as I would desire a lover to tell me and treat me every day. We are our greatest lovers!! Don’t slack when it comes to treating yourself as such. Okay, so this practice is self love talk but I want you to take it up a notch. Get a handheld mirror for this if you have one, look into your eyes, and begin bragging. Speak to yourself out loud in second person. For example I would say, “Krystal you are the most beautiful woman on the planet inside and out. You have the most caring and compassionate nature, you are so radiant. You have THE biggest heart I’ve ever witnessed. You are generous, loving, kind, wild, confident, sexy... You have gorgeous big brown eyes and radiant skin. Your body is breathtaking and the way you take care of your temple and yourself is so admirable. You’ve accomplished so much and are a huge inspiration…” You get the point! There was a time I’d really have to think about what I was going to say and take many long pauses, now I just typed that out without thinking twice and could’ve filled the entire page with personal praise easily. There was a time I’d also be shy to share that with you, not anymore! The days of playing small are gone babes, I want to witness you unapologetically shine. This is your bragging training. And no, bragging is not bad. Frankly, society has taught us to hate ourselves and feel the constant need to change ourselves; to feel as though we’re always missing something or never enough just as we are. To believe we need to be skinnier, prettier, wealthier, more accomplished (to society’s standards)… We’ve normalized talking poorly about ourselves, our bodies, and our lives. This is simply knowing what we bring to the table and claiming it. This is choosing to know how awesome we are while living in a society that constantly asks us, “Are you sure about that?” This is how we take our power back. One brag session at a time, baby.

Set your phone timer for 5 or 10 minutes and begin. There will likely be pauses your first few times but eventually it will begin to flow, and one day it’ll be natural and truly coming from your heart, I promise! Just have fun with it.

If it’s super uncomfortable at first- that’s great! It means there’s work to be done here.

Allow whatever comes through to arise and release. Let the experience be what it is. Don’t be too in your head about it.

Most importably, don’t be shy. It’s just you and you. BRAG away!

I have women do this in sacred circle in some of my workshops, so if its uncomfortable at first just be glad it’s only you and remember you’re deepening your relationship with yourself through this practice. That will then shine out into the world.

Love yourself in your discomfort, your awkwardness, your vulnerability… Your humanness. It’s when you are most beautiful.

This doesn’t make you conceited or cocky. It doesn’t mean you have to go around and repeat it to everyone, but it does mean you’ll embody a totally new energy when you cultivate a loving, boasting relationship with yourself behind closed doors. And that energy is magnetic.

• Daily spiritual practice. Spiritual = Spirit Ritual. This one is pretty straightforward. Come back to spirit, to yourself, each day.

When we neglect our spiritual practice, our daily ritual of connecting with our spirit/self, we begin to identity with what is outside of ourselves. When you look outside it always feel like you can do or be better, when you look within you remember you are divine perfection. You are the divine embodied. You could never be more or less worthy than you are right here and now.

Even by just spending 10 minutes in silent awareness each day, you’re moving energy within rather than outside of yourself. Fears and insecurities come from the ego, from outside, this is how we conquer them. Whenever I feel stressed or have some form of insecurities arise, I know that I need to sit alone with myself (usually in nature) more, and look outside of myself less.

Try these confidence boosters for yourself and report back to me how it goes for you!

With love & unapologetic confidence,

Krystal x